Wedding Invitations 101: Wedding Etiquette Part II

Once you finalize your wedding guest list, the next step is to design, print, address, and send out your invitations.  Invitations should be sent six to eight weeks prior to the wedding date; we recommend preparing invitations at least four weeks before the actual target send-out date. 


 The basic components to a traditional invitation are lines to designate the host, request the guests attendance, the names of the bride and groom, the date and time, location(s), reception card, and Repondez, s'il vous plait (RSVP).

The host line identifies the names of the individuals issuing the invitations.  Traditionally, the hosts are the bride's parents, printed as Mr. and Mrs. [father's first name] [father's last name].  If you, the bride and groom, are sharing the hosting with your family then it would traditionally read, 'Together with their families Miss [bride's name] and Mr. [groom's name].'  If the groom's family is hosting then it would read "Mr. and Mrs. [Groom's Father's first name and last name]. If just one parent is hosting,....well, you get the idea! The most important thing is to select the format and language that will best fit your situation. In this day and age, there are many possible situations, so just go with what is right for you and feels appropriate to all those involved. 

Next, the request line specifies what the guest is invited to do.  You will need to be sure to include whether your guest is invited to the ceremony, reception, or both.  The traditional wording for the request is broken into two categories: ceremony at a place of worship and ceremony at a secular location.  At a place of worship, the wording would read, 'request the honor of your presence;' for the request at a secular location it would read, 'request the pleasure of your company.'  If you and your groom have decided on an informal ceremony, you could also word your invitations as 'would be delighted by your presence at the marriage of their children.'

The main event is next: you and your groom.  The bride and groom line is laid out with the bride's and groom's names on separate lines with a preposition such as 'to' or 'and' on its own line in between.  Traditionally, if the bride's last name is the same as her parents' on the host line, the family name is not repeated and no courtesy title is used.  The groom's name is listed with first, middle, and last.  If a more contemporary wording fits you as a couple better (you and your groom are hosting or if both sets of parents are hosting) then treat both names equally.

The date and time lines of your wedding invitation give the pertinent information for a guest's calendar.  The traditional line would have the numbers spelt out and the proper nouns capitalized.  The line can start with a preposition, 'on,' if desired.  If you choose to go with something a little more contemporary, use numerals.

Location is also a critical element of your wedding invitation.  It is not traditional etiquette to include the street address, but it is becoming more common as it is not very practical to leave it off.  If you do choose to include the street, you could opt not to include the zip code. In some cases, it might also be helpful to include a small, stylish map and most guests will greatly appreciate this if your venue is an unusual location or your wedding is a destination wedding. 

You can include a reception line on the invitation or add a reception card to the envelope.  If your ceremony and reception locations are at the same venue, you can include the reception line on the main invite itself.  However, if they are at separate locations, it is best to do a small separate reception card.

Finally, the RSVP can be a line on the invite or more commonly a card with stamped envelope for response.  Traditional etiquette does not require a separate card, envelope, and/or stamp for the RSVP.  It is not considered rude to omit the stamped envelope and card, but it could raise the risk of guests not responding in a timely manner to RSVP.  If you include a RSVP line on the invite, it would appear in the lower left corner with the address, phone number, email, and/or website.  On a separate card, it is traditional to print fill-in-the-blank cards providing the first letter of 'Mr./Mrs.'  You can also include a single line such as 'please let us know whether you will join us' with a line for their writing.  A fun idea is to also include a song request line to the RSVP card so your guests can request songs at your reception and help you build your playlist.

One thing that it is not proper etiquette to include on your invitation is the registry information.  You can direct guests to your wedding website and include the information there, but not within the invitation envelope.


For more information on invitation etiquette, contact us at info@vintageandlace.com.


Warmest Wishes,
Heather


All photos from Etsy.com and are invitations for purchase!

Tips on Who to Invite to your Wedding: Wedding Etiquette Part I

Proper wedding etiquette is sometimes black and white and other times has a little room for preference and personalization.  Part I of wedding etiquette is reviewing who to invite.

from etsy.com

"Who to Invite?" A common question when so many details of planning are based on the number of guests that will attend your wedding: budget, location, design, seating, etc.  If you are trying to limit your guest list, then one of the first things you need to be aware of is proper etiquette.

♥  Inviting Plus Ones: If your guest is married, engaged, or living with a significant other it is customary to invite a plus one; if your guest is dating then it is not required that you invite a plus one with their invitation.  If you choose to invite some plus ones and not others, it is important to set a specific line as to why some are invited and others are not.  It would even be a good idea to inform those that are not invited to bring a plus one as to the reasons with a personal phone conversation so they do not get upset.  In addition, for your wedding attendants it is not required for them to be invited with a plus one, but it is common courtesy to allow them to bring a guest of their own since they are there to support you and your groom.

from theknot.com

♥  "What if we don't want young children at the wedding?" If you are having a formal wedding and would prefer children under a certain age to not attend, address your invitations with just the parents' names.  I would also recommend to follow-up with a personal conversation informing the parents that you really hope they can make it to your wedding and hope they have found someone to watch their children for that specific night.  If you decide to not invite children, do not make exceptions for those that make excuses because it would be rude to others that followed your request.  

from pacificweddings.com

♥  "They invited me, do I have to invite them?"  Reciprocal invites etiquette is always a common question especially if you are limited in your guest count.  If you attended the guests'-in-question wedding recently, your wedding is close to the same size or larger, and you are still on close terms with them then they should be invited.  If your wedding is on a smaller scale and/or if your friendship has lessened then it is appropriate to leave them off your guest list. 

photo by Toby Hoogs Photography via pacificweddings.com

For more information on wedding etiquette, contact us at info@vintageandlace.com!

Have a great day!

Heather

The Timeless Style of Vintage Inspired Wedding Dresses

Belle and Bunty

The timeless feminine fashions of the last 100 years aren't likely to go out of style anytime soon, especially with all the designers dedicated to vintage-modern designs that are popping up these days. And, who can blame them for incorporating vintage style into their latest runway fashions? How could you not be inspired by the fashions donned by starlet beauties like Audrey Hepburn and Marilyn Monroe? Will the beauty of those women ever go out of style? We think not.

weddingbellsblog.com

What might go out of style (fingers crossed!) is sickly thin models in skin tight over-the-top, too revealing or totally impractical fashions! We feel hopeful this is true because we see more and more brides wearing a modern interpretation of the best feminine, curvaceous and timeless styles of past eras that are sure to look just as beautiful in the photos 50 years from now as they did on the day of their wedding.

weddinggownssquare.com
Example of a very modern gown

Even if you are a total fashion-forward, worshiper of modern, daring trends, we suggest toning it down just a touch for your wedding or opting for two dresses: one timeless and one totally trendy. The last thing you want is to look completely ridiculous in 10-20 years when those fashions are completely out of date. For example, our least favorite fashion era is the 1980s because of the copious amounts of fabric used and the ever so infamous puff sleeves. Though very in at the time, they just don't hold up today. We LOVE Princess Diana and her sense of style was usually fabulously adventurous and elegantly modern for her time. However...and it pains us to say this...her fashion forward, over-the-top wedding dress just doesn't seem to have the timeless elegance that Grace Kelly's did. We are happy that Duchess Katherine chose to follow Grace and not Diana in her dress selection and we wish Diana would have chosen something a bit more flattering to her natural beauty.

Princess Diana's Dress, www.weddingwishlanterns.co.uk

Grace Kelly in her dress, www.marriage-new-york.com

Duchess Katherine in her ceremony dress, fashionista.com

Ok, ok, enough about Princesses -so how do you "marry" (hehe) vintage and modern ? There are many designers out there doing it so well and making it so easy for today's bride!

If you want a vintage inspired wedding dress to compliment your chic modern style on your wedding day, you have an array of designers to choose from:

One collection we love is Belle and Bunty, a London label known for exclusive, hand illustrated prints, vibrant use of color, and their signature feminine, individual, and elegant designs. Their designs are primarily from the 1930s-1940s era and offer styles with understated details.

Belle and Bundt

Ah, I can't get over the dress above! I think if I ever renew my vows, I am going this route in a super urban setting with luscious roses and jewel tones.

Belle and Bundt

As you probably know because the whole wedding world has been buzzing about it -we also adore Anthropologie's bridal child, BHLDN. They embody the vintage-modern we so love in a totally carefree, liberated modern woman kind of way!

BHLDN

BHLDN

BHLDN

There are also a lot of companies out there that don't advertise themselves openly or obviously as vintage -modern but definitely offer some options in that department. Wedding dress designer, Cymbeline, is one such company. Straight out of my parent's home of Paris, this chic company offers some stunning dresses that suggest vintage when paired with the right accessories. We occasionally stalk their photo gallery just to get inspired by the beautiful photography around Paris (Tip: It is a great place to get some ideas for fun poses if you are planning a Bridal Portraits Wedding Shoot). Here are a few that we drool over: 

Cymbeline

Cymbeline

Cymbeline

Cymbeline

Cymbeline

Another designer we think has a lovely vintage-modern and ultra feminine vibe is Victoria Nicole. The dress below is so sleek and soft with a surprisingly modern finish at the bottom. Because the architecture is not too bold and the folds don't end up looking like you threw on a down comforter (hate that!), it is timeless and modern at the same time.

And, if your style is all out vintage diva and you are looking for a truly authentic vintage dress, they are out there! It can be a bit of a challenge though because most stores will only have one size of each dress and you will likely have to order online without ever trying the dress on unless you are lucky enough to live near a great vintage boutique that carries wedding gowns. One online source company for authentic dresses is http://whirlingturban.com/wedding_boutique/. There are millions and your best bet is to search online for stores in your area so that you at least have a shot at finding something you can try on before you commit.

whirlingturban.com

There are so many choices when it comes to wedding dresses these days and the truth is that as long as you feel beautiful, comfortable and inspired, any dress you pick is perfect! Just consider how your dress might look in 50 years when you share those pictures with your grandchildren. Wouldn't it be lovely to have another woman in your family wear your dress or at least feel inspired by how beautiful and timeless you looked on your wedding day?

Happy Dress Shopping and remember to say to yourself every time you look in that mirror:

" I am beautiful and I am here because I am loved just the way I am! "

Aloha,

Rachael

Top Wedding Hair Style and Accessory Trends of 2011

There are so many options out there when it comes to choosing a Wedding Day Hairstyle or a special Wedding Hair Accessory to complete your Bridal look. Here are a few of our favorite Wedding Hair Trends from 2011 that incorporate the Vintage-Modern Fashions we SO love!

The Birdcage Veil

www.tobyhoogs.com

 Featured in our earlier post on Vintage Hairstyles, the birdcage veil has been a huge wedding hairstyle trend this year. Both modern and vintage, this look is romantic, edgy and interesting all at once. We just can't get over how beautiful some of the photos of brides in these veils are -like Beautiful Bride Amy shown above! With that said, we do suggest to all our brides that go the Birdcage Veil route to be sure to take it off for just a few of the photos though. This goes for any accessories really - it is always a good idea to have diversity in your wedding pictures, so be sure to mix it up!

For more birdcage veil inspirations or vintage hairstyle options, see our previous post:
http://vintageandlaceweddings.blogspot.com/2011/05/touch-of-vintage-hair-styles.html

Fresh Flowers for Your Hair

enamoreventsblog.com

theknot.com

This look is always in style, especially in Hawaii where it is common to tuck a flower behind one's ear on a daily basis. What type of flower and where it is placed varies widely though! Whether you have your hair all the way up, half up, or completely down, you can add a flower to give it intrigue and romance. Our recommendation: choose a flower that can withstand the test of time! The last thing you want is a flower that will wilt in your hair. Go with something that can handle the heat, be easily secured, and isn't too fragile to the touch -that way you know it will look good until the party is over! Ask your florist for recommendations on the best choices in your climate. We also recommend keeping it small and simple; a too big flower can distract from your own natural beauty.

 An Extra Long Cathedral Wedding Veil

www.tobyhoogs.com

www.tobyhoogs.com

We keep seeing more and more full-length cathedral or chapel veils and love this trend! Nothing quite says wedding like a veil and tons of 2011 brides seem to have embraced going all out with this ultimate wedding accessory. We love how these ultra long veils exude wedding drama and watching them flow in a gentle wind is just magical! We do think that this option can be slightly overpowering on a very petite bride though and sometimes looks best with a simple elegant gown design so that the overall look doesn't get too busy. However, we have seen it work on all brides and with all styles of dress, so if a long veil is your dream -we say go for it! Also, we recommend that even if you don't think you like veils, try one on at the bridal boutique! You might be surprised! ;)

Wedding Fastener Headpieces

smartbride.net

prettychicky.com

Often accented with a birdcage veil, we have seen tons of wedding hair fasteners in the wedding hairstyle trends this year. From architectural statement pieces to subtle crystal clips, accenting your hair with a little fastener is a huge DO! When else in your life do you really get to be totally feminine and fashion forward without regard for anyone's opinion than on your wedding day?

 Adding Color to Your Wedding Day Hair Style

theknot.com

theknot.com

Since we are on the subject of breaking the mold: who says you have to wear all white? More and more brides are opting to add a pop of color to their wedding look either through their jewelry or a colorful wedding hair piece. This is a great way to incorporate your "something blue" or to pick up your bridesmaid's dresses or wedding decor color for a cohesive but not too "matchy" look. We say if your style is bold, you love color, and you want a truly unique look, choose a colorful headpiece to match your colorful personality! Or, if you want a more traditional look for the ceremony, you can change to a colorful head piece just for the reception surprising your guests and new spouse! 

Bohemian Wedding Crowns, Halos, 

and Wreath Headpieces

http://www.etsy.com/shop/portobello?ref=seller_info

http://www.etsy.com/shop/LoBoheme?ref=seller_info

http://www.etsy.com/shop/LoBoheme?ref=seller_info

theknot.com

We love all the chic, sophisticated, and designer halos, wreaths, and crowns that we have been seeing in wedding fashion this year. Adding one of these amazing pieces gives your whole look a soft greek goddess or a modern urban princess vibe depending on what you choose. Though we can't all don the vintage Cartier Halo Tiara that Duchess Katherine wore, there are so many unique options out there, especially on Etsy, where you can even have a completely custom piece made just for you!


For more wedding fashion inspirations or wedding hair style help, follow this blog or our Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/VintageandLaceWeddings where we post daily fashion inspirations, wedding planning tips, and other beautiful, inspiring images that bring a little vintage-modern fun to your life!

For help planning your Big Island of Hawaii Wedding visit our website: www.vintageandlace.com!


Aloha!
Rachael

www.vintageandlace.com

Hello Dear Friends and Fans! We are so excited to announce that our long-awaited website is now LIVE! This is a big step for our wedding planning business and we are looking forward to your thoughts and feedback. We hope you enjoy it and please pass on the link to anyone you think might be interested in our wedding services! And, if you link us in one of your own blog posts or on your website, we'd be happy to reciprocate so please let us know!

Monique Montoya Perspectives Photography

www.vintageandlace.com

Thank you so much for the continued support as our partnership continues to grow!


Aloha,
Rachael and Heather

Yum, Wedding Cakes!

You have booked your wedding venue, sent Save-the-Dates, selected a florist, and found the perfect wedding dress, now you need to start sampling wedding cake!  Make it a fun event!  Take your fiance, your mom, your maid of honor, or a friend and set up an appointment with you favorite local baker and get ready to taste delicious samples!  Remember that you don't have to go with the traditional white cake, select your favorite;  whether it be carrot cake, triple chocolate, red velvet, or coffee cake, anything goes! 


Once you sample the yumminess and choose a flavor, you will have to choose a design. Recently we found some fantastic cake ideas online from Martha Stewart Weddings.  A popular trend is to use the lace from your wedding gown as inspiration for your cake design.

                                    Embroidered Lace                       Ikat and French Silk Ribbon                 

                                     Delicate French Silk               Midcentury Silk Scarf with a Abstract 
                                                                                                  Petal Design          

                                   Venetian Fabric - Granada                          Lace

                                 Vintage Graphic Floral Cotton                     Calico Print 

                                                Eyelet                                          Crewelwork 


Hmmm, after talking about and looking at all these pictures of cakes, I think I might have to go bake one myself!  :)

Don't hesitate to contact us here at V&L for more ideas on Wedding Cakes! 

info@vintageandlace.com

www.vintageandlace.com

Photos in this post:marthastewart.com.